WIRTW #570 (the “unexpected” edition)

I always assumed my kids would out-achieve me. I just never imagined it would happen by the 8th grade. 

Cleveland Magazine just named her band, Fake ID, Cleveland’s “Best Unexpected Rock Stars” in its 2019 Best of Cleveland issue.

It’s not everyday you witness a band of 12- to 15-year-olds absolutely wail on Black Sabbath’s “War Pigs.”

Yet there’s Fake ID, chugging through the sinister heavy metal classic with style and skill to spare, cresting a wave of pummeling sound…. Yes, the cover act’s ages often precludes bars and clubs from their tour dates, but Fake ID’s easy poise and undeniable chops tend to draw a crowd wherever they plug in.

You can read the rest of the story here, check out Fake ID at their website, and catch them performing at the Best of Cleveland Party at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on October 25.

Here’s what else I read this week:

6th Circuit holds that an employee cannot contractually shorten Title VII’s statute of limitations

In Thurman v. Daimler Chrysler, the 6th Circuit agreed that the following agreement between an employer and an employee shortening the time in which an employee has to file a lawsuit was lawful.

READ CAREFULLY BEFORE SIGNING I agree that any claim or lawsuit relating to my service with Chrysler Corporation or any of its subsidiaries must be filed no more than six (6) months after the date of the employment action that is the subject of the claim or lawsuit. I waive any statute of limitations to the contrary.

I’ve long argued that because of Thurman, employers should consider having all employees agree to a shortened statute of limitations to limit the duration of their potential exposure to employment claims. Yesterday, however, the same court punched big hole in this litigation avoidance strategy.

DOL announces new salary threshold for white collar exemptions

Yesterday, the Department of Labor announced that effective January 1, 2020, the salary threshold for an employee to be exempt from overtime under the administrative, executive, professional, and computer exemptions will increase from $455 per week to $684 per week (or $35,568 per year). For employers, this new threshold means that employees who are currently exempt and earn a salary of less than $684 per week will, in most cases, become non-exempt. The change is expected to impact an estimated 1.2 million workers.

Girl Scouts good / union organizers bad

What rights do you have to ban union organizers from your property? A lot. Your property is your property.

What if, however, you allow your employee’s daughter’s Girl Scout troop to set up a table outside and sell cookies? Have you just opened yourself to an argument that allowing cookie sales unlawfully discriminates against the banned union organizers?

No-fault attendance policies offer no cover when the ADA or FMLA are involved

An employee suffering from epilepsy, migraines, and heart condition asks (with a medical note) for two unpaid days off from work unpaid to treat symptoms related to her disabilities. Instead of granting the leave, the employer assigns the employee points under its no-fault attendance policy and fires her for exceeding the allowable number of attendance points. The EEOC has sued the employer, alleging disability discrimination.

WIRTW #569 (the “get by with a little help” edition)

I bet you can’t find someone having a better time than this guy.

I hope you have something in your life that brings you this much joy.

Here’s what I read this week.

Accommodating pregnant employees is a legal floor, not a ceiling

UPS has agreed to pay $2.25 million to settle a pregnancy discrimination charge investigated by the EEOC. The agency was to consider whether UPS’s policy of providing light duty as an accommodation to employees injured on the job, but not to pregnant employees, violated Title VII. The policy the agency was investigating appears to predate the Supreme Court’s 2015 decision in Young v. UPS.

When investigating misconduct, you don’t have to overturn every stone, but you also can’t ignore the obvious ones

Unless you're a wine nerd, you likely haven't heard about the cheating scandal that has rocked the Court of Master Sommeliers, the nonprofit governing body that administers the group’s exams.

For the uninitiated, the Master Sommelier diploma is the highest distinction a fine wine and beverage service professional can attain. To obtain the diploma, one must pass a three-part exam that includes an oral theory examination, a deductive blind tasting of six wines, and a practical wine service examination. The exam is so hard that there are only 262 professionals worldwide who have ever passed.

The Court of Master Sommeliers invalided 2018's Master Sommelier exam in its entirety after it was discovered that someone gave answers to the blind tasting portion of the test to at least one candidate. The board of the Court of Master Sommeliers conducted its own internal investigation of the allegations of cheating, issued a highly redacted report of its finding, and considers the matter closed after invalidating the entire exam.

It’s illegal to refuse to hire men, even if you’re a sex store

The EEOC has sued Sactacular Holdings, LLC d/b/a Adam & Eve for sex discrimination for refusing to hire male applicants. What is Adam & Eve? The EEOC’s news release describes it as a “North Carolina limited liability company.” The more accurate description? According to its (NSFW) website, it’s “the leader in the lingerie and adult boutique market.”

How did it discriminate?

Employee fired for stacking his intermittent FMLA leave with vacation days loses retaliation claim

Kevin LaBelle, a lab technician for Cleveland Cliffs, took occasional days off from work for approved intermittent FMLA leave for flare-ups related to a shoulder injury. His employer noticed that LaBelle seems to always take his FMLA leave by combining it with scheduled days off and vacation days.

WIRTW #568 (the “work songs, vol. 1” edition)

Today, I thought I’d take a look at some of the best songs ever written about working. Here are my first five. (These are not necessarily the “top 5,” and are not in any particular order; they are just the five that came to mind.)

• “Working Class Hero” — John Lennon 

They hurt you at home, and they hit you at school
They hate you if you’re clever, and they despise a fool
Till you’re so fucking crazy, you can’t follow their rules
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to be

• “9 to 5” — Dolly Parton

It’s a rich man’s game
No matter what they call it
And you spend your life
Putting money in his wallet
Working 9 to 5
What a way to make a living

• “Longer Than You’ve Been Alive” — Old 97’s

Now I’ve made a living out of shaking my ass
And if you offer me an office, I’d have to pass
But our jobs are all jobs, and sometimes they suck
I love what I do, and I’ve had pretty good luck

• “Takin’ Care of Business” — Bachman-Turner Overdrive

And if your train’s on time, you can get to work by nine
And start your slavin’ jobs and get your pay
If you ever get annoyed, look at me, I’m self-employed
I love to work at nothing all day

• “Career Opportunities” — The Clash

Oi!
Bus driver
Ambulance man
Ticket inspector
I don’t understand

What songs would you add to my list? Drop a comment below and let me know.

Here’s what I read this week:

It’s hard to win a lawsuit when you admit you don’t have a case

James Scott’s employer fired him for accumulating 10 points under its no-fault attendance policy. He claimed FMLA retaliation, alleging that his employer unlawfully assessed some of his points while he was taking FMLA-protected leave to care for his ill wife.

At his deposition, however, Scott admitted that the FMLA had nothing whatsoever to do with his termination.

When alcohol is involved, the ADA distinguishes between “having a disability” and “disability-related misconduct”

Alcoholism is an ADA-protected disability. Yet, the ADA does not require that employers accommodate alcoholics by permitting them to drink, or otherwise be intoxicated, on the job.

Case in point? Dennis v. Fitzsimmons (D. Col. 9/5/19).

The supposed #MeToo backlash is just discrimination by another name

A recent study suggests that there has been a backlash against the #MeToo movement.

According to  the Harvard Business Review, men have are treating their females co-workers differently because of #MeToo.

• 19% of men said they were reluctant to hire attractive women
• 21% said they were reluctant to hire women for jobs involving close interactions with men
• 27% said they avoided one-on-one meetings with female colleagues

NLRB asks for help to overturn some really $%#^ bad decisions

“Bob is such a NASTY MOTHER FUCKER don’t know how to talk to people!!!!!! Fuck his mother and his entire fucking family!!!! What a LOSER!!!!”

“Hey, did you bring enough KFC for everyone?” “Go back to Africa, you bunch of fucking losers.” “Hey anybody smell that? I smell fried chicken and watermelon.”

You’d think that if any of your employees lobbed any of these bombs at a supervisor or coworker, you’d have no legal issue if you fired them. And you’d be right … usually.

WIRTW #567 (the “passion” edition)

With a 13 year old with one foot dangling in the music business, I do a lot of reading about the music business, and what it means to live that life in 2019 and beyond. This article, written by Rhett Miller late last year, perhaps sums it up better than any I’ve read. It’s titled, The Loneliness of the Long Distance Rocker. And it paints a fairly bleak, isolating picture of what it’s like to be a musician  today.

In garages and basements and dorm rooms across the country and around the world, bands are forming this very minute. They are arguing over favorite songs, greatest albums, Stratocaster versus Telecaster, and inevitably which one of the members is going to have to switch from guitar to bass. These hopeful young dreamers give me hope. 

But we also shouldn’t kid ourselves: they are exceptions. For every one of these fledgling anarcho-syndicalist collectives, there are a thousand or a million kids alone in their bedrooms staring at Protools screens wondering what they have to do to get the Swedish cabal to write a hit song for them. They download a file onto Bandcamp or YouTube, start logging the hits, and pray. 

And oh my God, that sounds so lonely.

Yet, despite that depressing, like-count obsessed picture of today’s musician, Rhett’s tagline to his article is perhaps his most important thought. “Can music still save your mortal soul?” (He eloquently writes about how it saved his.)

I’m an optimist. As I look at my kids, and the community they are creating through the friendships and partnerships they are building through music, I have hope. Not hope for success or a hit song (because that’s not what it’s all about). But hope that they’ve found something to be passionate about, and like-minded people with whom to share that passion. For that’s what will lift them up and carry them through life. 

Here’s what else I read this week:

When common sense carries the day

Jordan does not explain how being disciplined for her unplanned absences and tardy arrivals created a hostile work environment. Without evidence indicating that she experienced severe or pervasive conduct, Jordan’s hostile work environment claim fails.

Every now again it’s refreshing to review a common-sense judicial opinion. Jordan v. United Health Group is just such a case.

Social media accounts are not telling you the whole story about your applicants and employees

If you rely on social media to paint for you a full and complete picture about your job applicants and employees, you are going to be very disappointed.

According to a recent survey, 43% of workers use privacy settings to keep material hidden from employers, and 46% have searched for their own names and taken further measures to conceal their social media presence based on what they found.

Why “ban the box” doesn’t work for employers or employees

Listen this clip from Ear Hustle (a podcast about “the daily realities of life inside prison shared by those living it, and stories from the outside, post-incarceration”), and then let’s chat about “ban the box.”

WIRTW #566 (the “sweet sixteen” edition)

We haven’t changed a bit after 16 years of marriage. Happy (yesterday) anniversary to my bestie!

Here’s what I read this week.