WIRTW #669: the “Lamborghini” edition

Either I cashed in some sweet crypto and bought a Lamborghini … or someone hacked my Instagram account.

(Hint: it's the second one.)

The most frustrating part is that I can't recover the account. 2FA isn’t working correctly so I can't reset my password. As a backup to confirm I'm me, Instagram asks for a video selfie to compare against photos in my account. But no matter how many selfies I submit, Instagram won't confirm me.

So I'm in Instagram hell, with an account I can't access, but someone else can. Meanwhile, they're using the account to spam my followers with nefarious requests about a new bakery "I" am opening that I can only assume will get them hacked, too.

Help!

If you work at Instagram or Meta and can help me get my account back (or can direct me to someone who can) I'll be eternally grateful.

For now, don’t click any links in any of "my" Insta Stories or Insta DMs from "my" account.

In the meantime, and until further notice, I'll be using the Insta account for The Norah and Dad Show Podcast as my own (with my co-host's/daughter's permission). Please follow me there.

Here's what I read this week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #668: the “obrigado” edition

Three years ago — March of 2020 to be precise — my family and I were supposed to spend our kids' spring break in Portugal. Then a little thing called Covid happened, we canceled our trip out of an abundance of caution, and the world went to hell for a long, long time. 

Three years later we are finally set to take our Portuguese holiday. We'll spend 12 glorious and much needed June days in continental Europe's westernmost nation, split across Porto (4 days), Peniche (3 days), and Lisbon (5 days). The Airbnb's are booked, the rental car is reserved, and I've marked my tour books with all of the must-see sites both in and around our three home bases and during our journeys in between. 

Here's my question for anyone who's been to Portugal — what are your best tips? 

• Off-the-beaten-path sites? 
• Restaurant and bar recommendation? 
• Tours, wine and otherwise?
• Anything else?

Thanks in advance for playing tour guide for me. I'll reward you with pictures and stories upon my return.

Here's what I read this past week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #667: the “gigs” edition

It's been a while since I've shared info about my daughter's music. Since she has a bunch of gigs coming up — starting tomorrow night at Front St Social in Berea — I figured today is a good time to fix that deficit. 

For those new to norah marie, check her out at norahmariemusic.com. She plays a mix of indie acoustic originals along with classic rock and alternative covers spanning the 60s through today.

All shows are free with no cover. But the bars love it when you buy drinks and food, and she always loves tips. You'll find all the details at norahmariemusic.com/gigs.

Here's what I read this week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #666: the “exchange” edition

Nine years ago my family and I embarked on an adventure. We hosted an exchange student from Germany for a school year. My own kids were in 2nd grade and kindergarten at the time and they loved having a big sister in the house. My wife and I loved everything about the experience, and we still think of Zarah as our third daughter, with whom we still communicate regularly. In fact, the experience was so positive that we promised ourselves that we'd never do it again for fear of being let down.

Well, we're doing it again. Each Spring our school (which enrolls between 30 and 40 exchange students per school year) emails parents looking for host families for the next school year. Something about one girl's bio caught the eye of both my wife and me. We independently reached the same conclusion — let's do this again. In August, we'll have a 9th grader (Donovan), a 12th grader (Norah), and a 10th grader (our exchange student). The kids are excited to have a new sibling with whom to share their high school experiences, and my wife and I are excited to have yet another German daughter. Life is all about experiences, so why not jump in with both feet?

You can hear all about our perspective on being a host family on this week's episode of The Norah and Dad Show. It's available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, our website, and everywhere else you get your podcasts.

Here's what I read this week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #665: the “grim reaper” edition

Earlier this week, I joined the People Problem Podcast to discuss death at work. Grim as it might be, it's an issue that we all face way too often. We talked about appropriate bereavement leaves, how to handle when an employee dies at work, and what best to when a team member dies away from work. It's a can't miss episode (gallows humor included).

You can listen to the episode here and everywhere else you get your podcasts. (And don't forget to subscribe while you're there.)

Here's what I read this past week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #664: the “CE” edition

Are you an HR professional in need of SHRM recertification credits? Will you be attending the Craft Brewers Conference in May? If you answered "yes" to both, then you're in luck. The Brewers Association just announced its Recertification Provider status with SHRM and will begin offering programs that qualify for SHRM recertification credits. CBC is the first of these programs.

SHRM will provide professional development credits for all seminars that take place as part of the THRIVE pre-conference workshop on Sunday, May 7 (which includes mine on ADA compliance, accommodations, and accessibility), in addition to select seminars in the main conference's THRIVE educational track. THRIVE is a day-long pre-conference workshop designed for owners, people leaders, HR, and diversity, equity, and inclusion practitioners that will provide an integrated dive into DEI, HR, and wellness topics for craft brewers of all sizes.

If you're planning on attending CBC let me know. I'll have more to share as we get closer to the event about when and where we can meet up. I'd love to buy you a beer.

Here's what I read this week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #663: the “growth” edition

Growth comes in many forms.  For my son, it came in the form of a daily injection of growth hormones since the age of seven. 

Because of his Noonan Syndrome, he's genetically predisposed to being short statured. That fact that I'm 5' 7" and his mom 4' 11" also didn't help his cause. Donovan was barely on the growth chart, and his doctors projected his full adult height at a mere 5' or 5' 1". Shortly after his 7th birthday he took his first dose of growth hormones, a daily injection. It was his decision after he was deemed not tall enough for a new bike he wanted. His endocrinologist at the time thought my wife and I were out of our minds for letting Donovan decide if and when to start treatment. To us, however, if he's the one taking the needle, he should have some say in the if and the when. 

Earlier this week Donovan took his final dose, a decision made by his current endocrinologist that he's received all of the possible medical benefit from the more than 2,700 injections he took over nearly eight years.

He's now close to 5' 7", with another inch or two still to grow. That's what I call growth.

Here's what I read this week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #662: the “platform” edition

Platform Beer Co. shook up the local beer industry Wednesday afternoon when its owner, Anheuser-Busch, confirmed that it had permanently closed the Cleveland brewery (along with its taproom and other related businesses) that it had acquired less than four years ago. All of its employees have lost their jobs as a result. 

Some backstory. Platform was a Cleveland craft beer success story. It opened its doors in 2014, and within five years had grown large enough to attract A-B as a buyer. Now, it no longer exists (except for the three IPAs that A-B says it will keep making).

While I have no inside knowledge as to what happened at Platform, I can offer an educated guess. Craft beer consumers are passionate about drinking craft beer. One of the key components to any craft brewery is its independence. Once A-B acquired Platform, it ceased being independent; it instead became part of A-B's $54 billion corporate behemoth. As a result, and no matter the quality of its beers, Platform lost its allure to the craft beer consumer. Without that attraction, sales dipped, making it ripe for the its tragic fate.

What's unfortunate is that a lot of good people lost their jobs as a result. Thankfully, our local beer community is collegial and collaborative. For example, Saucy Brew Works is offering any former Platform employee a daily free meal and pint, along with a job application, through the end of March. That's how you pay it forward. If you're a brewery looking to hire, there are lot of people in N.E. Ohio looking for work.

Here's what I read this week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #661: the “crafty” edition

Earlier this week I had the pleasure of presenting, Crafting Your Craft Brewery's Employee Handbook, a webinar jointly sponsored by Craft Beer Professionals and Start A Brewery. (Thank you, Andrew Coplon and Laura Lodge, for asking me to present 🍻) 

In 60 minutes, I discussed why every business needs an employee handbook and ran through every policy a craft brewery needs in its handbook. While the presentation is craft brewery focused, any business of any size will find most of the information applicable. I guarantee you'll learn something.

You can watch the entire webinar here.

Here's what I read this past week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #660: the “Freckles” edition

Two weeks ago I shared the story of Freckles, the toad that my daughter rescued from our backyard. On our podcast — The Norah and Dad Show — we left you with a cliffhanger. Did Freckles live or die. On this week's episode we share Freckles' fate, along with the fate of Norah's high school mock trial team.

You'll find The Norah and Dad Show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Overcast, Amazon Music, in your web browser, and everywhere else podcasts are available.

Here's what I read this past week that you should be reading, too.

WIRTW #659: the “99 problems” edition

I got 99 problems, but being a podcast guest ain't one.

I love the People Problems Podcast so much. And they must love me, too, since this is my third appearance as a guest.

This week's episode is all about dating at work. The conversation goes all over the place, including to a mafia bar in Chicago. You'll have to listen to the episode to hear all about the craziest experience of my legal career.

Here's what I read this past week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #657: the “Let me buy you a beer” edition

From Jan. 30 – Feb. 1, the Ohio Craft Brewers Conference is taking place in Cleveland. My firm and I are playing a prominent role. 

• On Jan. 30 we are sponsoring the opening reception at Forest City Brewery, from 5:30 - 7 pm. If you've never been, it's an amazing space, a restored 19th century brewery building. It has the oldest (and, imho, most beautiful) beer garden in Ohio, and one of the oldest in the nation … although it might be a tad cold to fully enjoy it. Forest City also produces some of the best beer in NE Ohio — I recommend the Opening Day IPA and the Hootenanny (a kölsch). Finally, Apostle Jones, a local rock and soul band, is providing the musical entertainment. They are not to be missed. Look for me at the Wickens Herzer Panza table (where we'll have some nice giveaways) or milling about the brewery. Stop and say hi and I'll be sure to buy you a beer. This is an open event and you do not have to be registered for the conference to attend.

• On Feb. 1, at 11 am, I am speaking in the Fundamentals Room on Crafting Your Craft Brewery’s Employee Handbook. 

I hope to see you there. Cheers!

Here's what I read this past week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #656: the “Dilenogate” edition

Until now, I've avoided writing about Dilenogate, the story that has gripped the Cleveland legal community and the nation. 

To sum it up, Jon Dileno, a (now former) senior labor and employment attorney at Cleveland law firm Zashin & Rich sent a highly offensive and inappropriate text to an employee who, instead of returning to the firm following her maternity leave, accepted a new job and gave her notice. 

He called her "soul-less and morally bankrupt," threatened to trash her in any future job references, and accused her of "collecting salary from the firm while sitting on your ass" while on maternity leave. 

The story went crazy viral after Kelly Barnett shared the story and text message on LinkedIn.

In response to the viral story, the firm put out a weak (and I'd argue further damaging) now-deleted post on its own LinkedIn page: "That single text was sent in the heat of the moment by an employee upset by the belief that the former colleague while on paid leave sought employment with another law firm." As pressure mounted, however, it published another post the next day: "After careful consideration, Jon Dileno is no longer with Zashin & Rich."

So much digital ink has been spilled about this story, there's no need for me to pile on. Instead, I merely direct you to the following:

• When an Employee Returns from FMLA Leave, Don't Be This Employer — via Jeff Nowak's FMLA Insights
• Maternity Leave Is Not "Sitting Around on Your Ass" — via Suzanne Lucas at Inc.com
• Firm Parts Ways with Lawyer Who Called Maternity Leave "Sitting on Your Ass", After Text Calling Maternity Leave "Sitting on Your Ass," Law Firm Looks oo Sit on Its Ass on Response, and "Collecting Salary from the Firm While Sitting on Your Ass" Is Certainly ONE Way for a Senior Lawyer to Describe Maternity Leave — via Above the Law
• Text accusing exiting lawyer of sitting on her keister during maternity leave leads to second departure — via ABA Journal
• Cleveland law firm, attorney criticized after social media post shows insulting text sent to attorney who left firm after maternity leave — via Cleveland.com

I'll merely add the following to this important discussion. The legal community and, more broadly, the entire business community, needs to do better with pregnant workers and new moms. Childbirth and maternity leave aren't a vacation. We as employers (heck, as humans) should never treat it as such, nor should we stigmatize or punish our employees for doing that which their bodies naturally — give birth. Bringing a child into this world is difficult enough. We don't need to make it any harder than it already is. 

Support new moms; don't retaliate against them. Here's a three suggestions to consider that will not only help you support your employees, but will also help you recruit to and keep talent in your business.

1.) Offer strong parental leave programs. The FMLA requires 12 weeks of unpaid leave. Consider offering more, or offering to cover the employee's pay for some/all of the leave. If you're not FMLA covered or the employee isn's FMLA eligible, consider mirroring the statute for your employees anyway.

2.) Ramp up/down policies. Plenty of employees work their full 40 right up until their due date, and jump right back into the deep end of work as soon as their leave ends. But consider a phase out and a phase in with reduced hours on both ends. It helps the new mom's physical health leading up to childbirth and her mental health in returning to work.

3.) Schedule flexibility. Parenting isn't a nine-to-five job. It's a 24/7/365 job that is really good at throwing curveballs to parents. Late nights with little sleep. Unexpected doctor appointments. Visits to the pediatric ER. Do you want a sleep deprived or otherwise distracted employee at work. You certainly won't get their best. So try to be as accommodating and understanding as possible. Flexible hours and remote work help ease the stress caused by the unexpectedness of raising a newborn.

If you're not part of the solution, then you're part of the problem. Don't be part of the problem.

Here's what else I read this week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #655: the “FTC did WHAT?!?!” edition

Yesterday, the FTC broke the employment law internet when it announced a Notice of Proposed Rulemaking that, if it takes effect, would ban all employment-related non-compete agreements on a national level.

The proposed rule, on which the FTC will accept comments for the next 60 days, would—

• Provide that noncompete clauses are an unfair method of competition, and, as a result, would ban employers from entering noncompete clauses with their workers, including independent contractors; and

• Require employers to rescind existing noncompete clauses with workers and actively inform their employees that the contracts are no longer in effect.

The FTC is also soliciting opinions on certain key issues, such as whether senior executives should be exempted from the rule, or subject to a rebuttable presumption rather than a ban; and whether low- and high-wage workers should be treated differently.

The agency has published a wealth of information, including the proposed rule itself and a fact sheet.

I have serious questions, specifically as to how a federal agency can enact a rule such as this, and whether a change of this magnitude must be enacted by law and not regulation. To me, this rule would go well beyond the FTC's rulemaking authority. Expect litigation to be filed in a business-friendly court, and for the Supreme Court to have the final say on this important issue. It is certainly far from a done deal that this proposed regulation will ever take effect. So keep those noncompete agreements in place, at least for now.

Here's what else I read this past week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #654: the “gifts” edition

What's the best holiday gift you've ever given or received? With the holidays quickly approaching, this is the question Norah and I tackled on this week's episode of The Norah and Dad Show.

Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Overcast, Amazon Music, Stitcher, internet, and everywhere else you listen to podcasts. And while you're in your podcast player of choice, hit the subscribe button to ensure that you never miss a future episode.

Before I sign off for 2022, I'll be back next week with two gifts for you — the winner of The Worst Employer of 2022 (Wed.) and this year's telling of The Employment Law Night Before Christmas (Thurs.).

Here's what I read this past week that you should be reading, too.

WIRTW #653: the “playlist” edition

Last Friday, after sharing the Old 97's new holiday classic from the Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special, I asked LinkedIn for their favorite holiday songs. My LinkedIn community delivered in a major way. So today, I am thrilled to be able to share with you Jon Hyman's LinkedIn Crowdsourced Holiday Music Playlist Extravaganza. 

It's 42 songs spread over 2 hour, 27 minutes of eclectic rock, punk, country, pop, rap, and classical holiday standards and songs that will now be standards for your holidays. 

It's available to stream on Apple Music and Spotify. Shuffle, repeat, and jingle all the way through the holiday season.

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If you haven't already voted for The Worst Employer of 2022, what are you waiting for? Polls remain open until 14-Dec. 

VOTE HERE.

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Here's what I read and listened to this past week that you should also read and listen to.

WIRTW #652: the “caroling” edition

I love a good Christmas song. The problem is that too many of them are just not very good. Today, I'm adding one to your holiday music playlist that is sure to stick with you like the best kind of earworm.

I Don't Know What Christmas Is (But Christmastime Is Here) is from The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special (streaming on Disney+). The fact that it's performed by my friends and favorite band, Old 97's, is irrelevant to just how much a banger of Christmas tune this is. If you've seen the special, you've also seen the band; they're the alien band performing their songs on screen.

Here's guitarist Ken Bethea reflecting to D Magazine about the coolest part of the experience of filming the special at Marvel's studios outside of Atlanta:

The coolest part was at the end, when the props designer led us into his office and showed us Captain America's shield, Thor's hammer, Doctor Strange's necklace, and Black Widow's batons. I asked if I could hold them and he said, "Absolutely." So I picked up—dare I say wielded—the shield and hammer, which together weighed about 80 pounds. For one shining moment, I could feel the envy of a billion Marvel fans. 

And here's what Director James Gunn told The Hollywood Reporter about working with his favorite band:

These guys are the greatest guys in the world, but they had to be in hell because people complain so much about that makeup when they're in it. But they never once complained. They were singing and playing their instruments for eight hours, and they just kept going and going and going, cut after cut. So they were amazing. They're just the greatest guys, not to mention the greatest music. So I hope this turns a lot more people on to the Old 97's.

I couldn't agree with James Gunn more.

Here's what I read this past week that you should be reading, too.

WIRTW #651: the “thankful” edition

As we head into the Thanksgiving holiday, I thought I'd take a moment to say a few thank-yous, as I have a lot for which to be thankful.

🙏 Thank you to all of my readers, followers, and commenters, here and on LinkedIn and Twitter (for as long as Twitter remains a thing). We might not always agree, but if we did it would be crazy boring. 

🙏 Thank you to all of the bad employers, who continue to act before they think (or don't think at all) and provide me content for all of my posts.

🙏 Thank you to my law firm, which supports my online fancies. They hired me to run our labor and employment practice, and didn't bat an eye when I expressed an intent to spread my wings into craft beer law. 

🙏 Thank you to all of the organizations that invited me to speak in 2022, and a special shoutout to Business Management Daily, which hosts my monthly column and for which I'll be speaking monthly next year. Also, if you want to toast a beer with me, look for me at the Ohio Craft Brewers Conference in Cleveland from 1/30 – 2/1, and at the national Craft Brewers Conference in Nashville from 5/7 – 5/10.

🙏 Thank you to my family, who continue to support my career.

🙏 Thank you to my daughter, Norah, who still wants to create a podcast with her dad. As for our podcast, our newest episode addresses all things Thanksgiving, or at least all things Thanksgiving that matter, including food, food, food, parades, football, family, and food. You can listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music, Overcast, Stitcher, our website, or anywhere else you get your podcasts.

Here's what I read this past week that you should be reading, too.

WIRTW #650: the “Mastodon” edition

Call me a Twitter Armageddon Prepper. I'm not ready to abandon Twitter … yet. Even with Elon Musk in charge, I have 14 years and way too much human capital invested to jump ship even I think the Chief Twitterer is a twit.

But I'm also not convinced that Musk won't burn the whole platform to the ground. He's laid off half of the company's employees, some of whom are warning that the website is "built on sticks, and might … fall apart." Advertisers (along with their crucial revenue) are fleeing it in droves. Musk is banning users in a manner that is antithetical to his "free speech" ethos. The company's cybersecurity chief quit, along with its head of trust and safety, chief privacy officer, and chief compliance officer. Heck, even the Muppets quit. And in news that should surprise no one, Musk's paid account verification system is an absolute mess. We're all aboard the digital Titanic.

The Bird is a hot mess, and not in a "rising phoenix" kind of way. It's more of a "deep-fried turkey that boils over and burns the house down" kind of way. Or a "Twitter will soon be bankrupt" kind of way.

Thus, I've been looking for an alternative … just in case. Like many, I've landed on Mastodon as a potential Twitter replacement.

Mastodon is a microblogging platform similar to Twitter in many ways. 

• Mastodon has toots (compared to Twitter's tweets).
• Toots are limited to 500 characters (compared to Twitter's 280).
• You can favorite and boost other user's posts (as compared to liking and retweeting), but you can't quote.
• Hashtags are still hashtags.
• Mastodon's layout, look, and feel will appear very familiar on the web and on its mobile app to anyone who's ever used Twitter. Updates, however, are sorted chronologically instead of algorithmically 

The key difference, however, exists on Mastodon's backend. Mastodon isn't its own standalone website. Instead, it's a series of connected private servers that communicate with each other. When you sign up for a Mastodon account, you sign up to become a member of a particular server, privately hosted and moderated, and not part of Mastodon as a social media platform. Because all of the servers communicate with each other and you see posts from any server, as best as I can tell it doesn't necessarily matter the server to which you belong, and you're always free to switch servers at any time. 

And that's all I know. My account is parked at @jonhyman@toot.community. If you decide to give Mastodon a try, let me know by following me, and I'll be sure to follow you back.

Here's what I read this past week that you should read, too.

WIRTW #649: the “Ye” edition

We need to talk about Kanye. 

In the wake of his rampant and unapologetic antisemitism, people are hanging antisemitic banners on highway overpasses and projecting antisemitic slogans on the side of college football stadiums, others are dressing up like Hitler and other Nazis for Halloween, and famed Covid-denier and flat-earther Kyrie Irving is sharing a movie full of antisemitic tropes. 

Employers need to take a firm stand against hatred. Now is not the time to stand idly by. 

Anti-Semitism is wrong. 

White supremacy is wrong. 

Racism is wrong. 

Xenophobia is wrong. 

Homophobia, lesbophobia, biphobia and transphobia are wrong. 

Hard stop. 

Anyone displaying this hate, whether inside or outside of work, should be fired. 

Any idiot is free to say whatever he or she wants. But as an employer, I am free to hold that idiot accountable for his or her ignorant hatred. Actions have consequences, and until we start holding people accountable for theirs, we are signaling that this is okay, that this is normal. It's far from okay or normal. It's disgusting and deplorable. 

Silence in the wake of hate at best condones the hate, and at worst participates in it. If it's my business, I choose not to stay silent.

Here's what I read/listened to this past week that you should also read/listen to: